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Monday 08/05/06 11:36am
Good Morning Wellington! Hallelujah! His mercy is new every morning!
Well, It took me a year to sign up for this, Finally...! Very exciting!! Praise God :) Although im not feeling very well, but his grace is sufficient for me! I will still Rejoice and Praise him no matter what lies ahead, no matter how hard circumstances could be!
Well, took a day off from work..needing this for a long time adi. (rest & away mode). Still struggling whether to go for a doctor (cuz the consultation fees are expensive, since im not under the international student's insurance anymore).. but ya, our body is the temple of the holy spirit..(1 Corinthians 6:19) must take care! Its priceless..!! Havent fallen sick for ages (more than a year, broke my life record!). I was a regular patient every since young..always with stomach n head problems.. (people close to me knows it well, but god have healed me last year of my menses and gastric problems! Amen!)
One thing that touches me most, my boss - Anna rang me few minutes ago and asked me if i've went to the doctors already! Im so so touched, she's not only giving me a day off, but also rang & reminded me to go to the doctors!! Unbelievable :) I Truly see god's love through & in her !!! Amazing eh~!?
I was feeling very discouraged, dissapointed and weary for months already i guess..!?! Fire up till flaming down! Looking back at the serving "Passion" i had from 1 1/2 years ago till few months back, seeing it diminishing day by day, bits by bits.. and it even came till a point that i was wanting to give up, leave this country and head home to Malaysia! (Having real hard financial difficulties, flat issues, people issues, cultural issues, misunderstanding and miscommunication, lack of support and care, unbalanced life...etc).. all these life tangles were driving me CRAZY!! Started to be confused of his will and direction for me, started to question if he still wants me to stay in NZ, started to hide from people, started to feel so tired in doing his work... etc...Started to feel HOMESICK!?! (never have happened in my life..)
Sounding real negative eh!?! Seasons change, but god's love will never change! He's still the same in the past, present and will still be d same in future! I was weeping yesterday, but hv learnt and being so encouraged by him today! The Devil came to steal and kill my passion, causes confusion and doubt so that i may eventually give up n leave... but God came that i may have life, a life to have it to the full! (John 10:10) Praise god!
God have placed so many guardian angels around me.. Well, God have never promised me a smooth and problemless life, but hv promised me to go through my life tangles with me! It's through trial and tribulation that i grow and learn! I thank you god for all the challenges that you've given to mould me to become a better person! The moment that i felt like giving up.. people not understanding me, he've sent Justin, Ricky, David, Ching and Stephanie to listen to me...(emails, text messages, time & energy, food...) the moment i felt like nobody cares, he've sent John and Jono to visit and pop by saying hello~! (even wrote me a card and gv me a box of chocolate juz becuz they notice i wasnt at church) I was truly touched.. all these are not by accident..but god's plan~!
I thank you lord for Justin, Ricky and Ching for supporting and encouraging me all the way with god's word and love! When i was sharing breakfast with Ching this morning, having great discouragement again.. feeling sick and weak.. she decided not to go to class.. and suggested to watch a video sermon at City Harvest , Singapore website...! I was blown away by the message and being lifted up again in spirit! God, u're amazing..! u know what i juz needed and hv sent someone like Ching to remind me of your Grace and Mercy~!
I would love to share what ive learnt this morning that hv encourages me so much inside out...~! This is preached by a phenomenal speaker - Rev Mark Conner from Melbourne City Life Harvest Church:
Passion: is the fire inside that affects everything outside
: Comsuming fire and perpextual enthusiasm!
The Devil loves to target our passion to serve the lord! (these are what exactly hapening to me NOW!)
4 Passion Killers:
1. Complacency
- When we become comfortable with where and what we are.
- being settled in a good enough box
- Satisfied of what we've accomplished in the past, and not wanting to move
forward to achieve for the greater!
2. Difficult circumstances
- Conflicts, dissapointment, criticism, opposition n discouragement
(YA,exactly my situation now)
3. Unbalanced Lifestyle
- The devil will want to lead you to these so u would burn out!
- Too busy, not time for relaxation...
- No balance of Activity and time of rest! (my current situation 2)
4. Familiarity
- Routine that leads to a boring and unmeaningful task
Firelighters of Passion: What can we do?
1. Activate your spiritual gift
- Discover ur gift and infining your passion
- What frustrates you and annoys you are often what god wants you to do to
improve on of what you see and realize
eg: You are frustrated when the lost are not saved, and so he wants u to
be a pastor or evangalist!
2. Associate people with passion
- Get yourself some people around that is passionate and on fire! (hebrews
10:24-25)
3. Return to your first love
4. Pray 4 Passion!!
Wow! This sermon blew me away! Reading Exodus 8 tells me that.. if you're passion is going away, why wait till tomorrow to pray? why wait till tomorrow to get it back?
Amazing! No one has actually told me that the Devil will snatch and rob my passion away.. but i notice god has made me realize that Devil can and will do that.. until this sermon reassures me once again~! Im so so touched:) and im so glad that i've decided to take a day off today.. to restore my physical, mental and spiritual health. Praise god!
Feel so pumped again today!! Never quit!! Never!! Be strong!!
Romans 5:3-5 We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope
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| | Posted 5/7/2006 10:48 PM - 1346 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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